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The Pain No One Sees: Chronic Pain, Menopause and Finding Your Way at Work.
THE INVISIBLE PAIN BEHIND THE PROFESSIONAL SMILE
Picture the scene. You have your work clothes on, your laptop open, three meetings lined up and a to-do list that appears to have been written by someone who thinks there are 36 hours in a day. You are ready to conquer the world. Except your knees hurt, your shoulders ache, your fingers feel stiff, and getting out of your chair requires the sort of negotiation usually reserved for international peace treaties.
Welcome to the less-talked-about side of midlife: chronic pain, menopause and trying to keep your career on track while your body appears to have developed its own rather unhelpful HR policy. 🙃
World Menopause Day falls on 18 October, and the 2026 theme is Chronic Pain at Midlife. It is an important opportunity to shine a light on the aches, stiffness and persistent discomfort that can affect women during perimenopause and menopause, including the impact on working lives.
In its World Menopause Day article, Spark Your Health provides a starting point for exploring this year's focus. The message matters: pain deserves attention, not dismissal, and women should not have to struggle in silence simply because their symptoms are difficult for other people to see.
Because you can look perfectly professional on a Teams call while secretly wondering whether your hips have been replaced with rusty hinges.
UNDERSTANDING THE PAIN
Menopause is not simply about hot flushes, night sweats and suddenly finding yourself fanning your face in a supermarket queue. Hormonal changes can affect multiple areas of the body, and some women experience muscle aches, joint pain and stiffness during the menopause transition.
The Menopause Charity's guidance on joint and muscle pain explores these symptoms and their potential connection with menopause. Meanwhile, Dr Louise Newson's article on perimenopause, menopause, aches and pains discusses how hormonal changes may contribute to musculoskeletal discomfort.
These are useful resources for understanding what might be happening, but there is an important distinction: not every ache is caused by menopause. Persistent or worsening pain can have other explanations, so it is worth speaking to your GP rather than automatically blaming declining oestrogen for everything from a stiff neck to a grumpy ankle.
Pain can also affect sleep, concentration, energy and mood. When you are exhausted from a night of discomfort, even a straightforward email can feel like an advanced examination in diplomatic relations.
And if you are struggling to concentrate, remember this: difficulty functioning at your usual level does not mean you have suddenly become less capable. Sometimes your body is using an enormous amount of energy simply getting through the day.
WHEN PAIN WALKS INTO THE OFFICE
Chronic pain can make working life complicated. Commuting may become exhausting, sitting for long periods uncomfortable, and standing through a presentation an endurance event worthy of its own medal.
For some women, pain comes and goes. For others, it becomes a persistent companion that affects their ability to work consistently. Add menopause-related sleep disruption, caring responsibilities or an already demanding job, and the juggling act becomes considerably less amusing.
The trouble is that pain is often invisible. Colleagues may see someone who looks well and assume everything is fine. Managers may interpret reduced productivity as disengagement, while the woman herself may be quietly wondering whether she is losing her professional edge.
Let's challenge that assumption.
Your value at work is not measured by how comfortably you can sit through a two-hour meeting without moving, how many consecutive days you can push through exhaustion, or whether you can conceal every symptom behind a perfectly applied lipstick.
You are a person, not a productivity machine. Even the most expensive office equipment needs maintenance.
SMALL ADJUSTMENTS, BIG DIFFERENCE
You do not necessarily need to overhaul your entire working life to make it more manageable. Start by identifying what makes your symptoms worse and what helps.
Here are five practical places to begin:
BECOME A MOVEMENT DETECTIVE. Notice whether sitting, standing or remaining in one position for too long increases your discomfort. If appropriate for your symptoms, try regular movement breaks, gentle stretching or alternating between sitting and standing. Little and often may be more manageable than one heroic workout followed by two days of regret.
RETHINK YOUR WORKSTATION. An ergonomic chair, suitable keyboard, supportive footwear or adjusted desk height may help reduce unnecessary strain. Ask about a workstation assessment if you are struggling.
PLAN AROUND YOUR ENERGY. If pain or poor sleep affects your concentration, schedule demanding tasks for the times when you generally feel most alert. Break large projects into smaller steps and allow breathing space between meetings.
MAKE WORKING FROM HOME WORK FOR YOU. Where your role permits it, remote or hybrid working may reduce commuting strain and give you more control over your environment. However, home working is not automatically the answer for everyone. Think about what genuinely makes your working day easier.
KEEP A SYMPTOM AND ACTIVITY DIARY. Note when pain occurs, what you were doing, how you slept and what helped. This can help you identify patterns and give your healthcare professional more useful information.
Above all, avoid turning self-care into another impossible performance target. You do not need a colour-coded spreadsheet entitled Operation Perfect Menopause. A few useful observations and realistic adjustments are a perfectly good start. 📝
TALKING TO YOUR EMPLOYER WITHOUT FEELING YOU HAVE TO EXPLAIN EVERYTHING
You do not need to disclose every detail of your health to ask for a conversation about making work more manageable.
Start with the practical issue and the change that might help. For example:
“I’m experiencing a health issue that is affecting my comfort during long periods of sitting. Could we explore some adjustments to my workstation and meeting schedule?”
Depending on your circumstances, useful adjustments might include flexible start times, additional breaks, temporary changes to duties, a different workstation or hybrid working.
In the UK, the Equality Act 2010 may protect some people whose health conditions meet the legal definition of disability. Chronic pain does not automatically qualify, and menopause itself is not a protected characteristic, although related circumstances may engage protections under disability, sex or age discrimination law. Individual circumstances matter. (Menopause matters are most likely sex discrimination, as men won’t go through the same in their lives.)
Employers should consider requests fairly and explore practical options. If your condition amounts to a disability under the Act (which Menopause does), an employer may have a legal duty to make reasonable adjustments.
You can find further information through Spark Your Health's World Menopause Day 2026 workplace guide. If you are unsure of your rights, Acas and Citizens Advice are useful places to start.
And remember, asking for support is not an admission of professional defeat. It is a sensible attempt to make your working life sustainable. 💪
WHEN YOUR CONFIDENCE TAKES A KNOCK
Here is the bit that often gets overlooked: pain can affect more than your physical comfort. It can change how you see yourself.
Perhaps you used to be the person who volunteered for every project, travelled without a second thought or happily worked late to get something over the line. Now you are calculating how much energy a meeting will cost you and wondering whether you can manage the commute tomorrow.
It is understandable to feel frustrated, anxious or even resentful about the changes.
But please do not confuse needing a different approach with losing your ability.
Your career is not a competition to see who can endure the most discomfort without mentioning it. Nor do you need to prove your worth by continuing to work in ways that no longer serve you.
Try asking yourself three questions:
What parts of my job still energise me, even on difficult days?
Which tasks, routines or expectations are making my symptoms harder to manage?
What could I change, negotiate or delegate to make work more sustainable?
These questions can help you distinguish between a job that is genuinely wrong for you and a job that might become manageable with the right support.
Sometimes the answer is a workplace adjustment. Sometimes it is a conversation with your manager. And sometimes it is time to consider a different role, employer or working pattern.
You do not have to make a dramatic career decision on a particularly painful Tuesday. Start with information, not panic.
YOUR CAREER, YOUR RULES
If pain is affecting your working life, give yourself permission to reassess what success looks like.
Perhaps it means working differently rather than working more. Perhaps it means protecting your lunch break, declining an unnecessary meeting or negotiating a more flexible schedule. Maybe it means exploring a career change that offers greater autonomy.
Think about your transferable skills, professional experience and the knowledge you have accumulated over the years. None of that disappears because your body needs more consideration.
A useful exercise is to draw three columns on a piece of paper:
KEEP: The aspects of work you enjoy and want to retain.
CHANGE: The tasks, routines or conditions that could be improved.
EXPLORE: New roles, opportunities or working arrangements worth investigating.
This simple exercise turns a vague feeling of “I cannot keep doing this” into a more constructive question: “What would make this work better for me?”
And if you need support to explore those options, you do not have to figure everything out alone.
A career coach can help you clarify your priorities, rebuild confidence, challenge unhelpful assumptions and develop a practical plan. Where appropriate, occupational health or your healthcare professional may also help you explore the support you need.
You are allowed to want a fulfilling career and a body that receives the care it deserves. These are not competing ambitions.
A FINAL THOUGHT: PAIN IS REAL, AND SO IS YOUR POTENTIAL
This World Menopause Day, let's move beyond the assumption that midlife women should simply grit their teeth, get on with it and keep everyone else comfortable.
Chronic pain deserves to be taken seriously. Menopause symptoms deserve informed, individualised care. And women deserve workplaces where asking for reasonable support is treated as a normal part of working life, not a sign of weakness.
Start small. Record your symptoms. Seek appropriate medical advice. Experiment with practical adjustments. Have the conversation you have been putting off. And if your career needs a rethink, approach it with curiosity rather than self-criticism.
You may not be able to control every ache, every difficult day or every workplace response. But you can begin to identify what you need, what is possible and which next step feels manageable.
If you are navigating midlife changes and wondering how to make your career work for the person you are today, I would love to help you explore your options. At Pause And Empower, I offer a free 30-minute Discovery Call to talk through what is happening, what matters to you and where you might go next.
Because your career should support your life, not require you to sacrifice your wellbeing to keep it going. 💜
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